Quotes from the ER...

"You're a sad, cold-hearted bitch, you know that? You may not like me, but nobody here likes you. Do you know why this ER is so damn important to you, lady? Do you know why? 'Cause it's the only thing you've got in your life, you nazi dyke."
-Dave Malucci's last words on ER (Episoode 3, season 8 - Blood, Sugar Sex, Magic)

Carter: There are no small patients, Dave.
Dave: What about dwarfs?
-Mars Attacks

Thanks to Monica for the following quote:  

  Kerry : Dr. Malucci, if I don't see you standing over a sick patient in the next 30 seconds looking compassionate and engaged, you'll spend the next week doing nothing but disempactions and yeast infections.

  Thanks to E. Hursh for the following quotes.

 Dave "I think Weaver's got it in for me. I don't know what I ever did to Festus to get her so pissed."
Carter "Maybe it was calling her 'Festus'."
Dave "Well, never to her face."

 "You picked up a loculated mass? No kidding? I wouldn't know one if it bit me on the ass."

 "Butt boil and hemorrhoids. This is what I went to medical school for."

 "I spent some time in the jungle. And if you're nice to me, I'll even show you my piranha scars."

 "I had fun in college, what I can remember of it."

 Thanks to Voodoo Chick for these quotes...

 "(to Abby)You know that it's tradition for residents to take their students out for drinks after.....whoa....(to Chen)...you look....wow."

 "Oh man that's nasty!" (to the patient with the pen stabbed through his cheek)

 "(to Kerry) Am I a yuppie, Chief?"

"(Kerry to Dave) No. But you will be one when you grow up!"

 Thanks to Sarah for this quote...

 CAROL ( regarding Mark) : He was off at eight, double-date
DAVE: I'm on till nine, mighty fine !

 Thanks to Lindsay for these quotes...

 "I've got it comin' out of both ends, Chief." - Abby Road

 "No, Sherlock, I went to med school in Grenada. It's the Harvard of the Caribbean, actually." - Great Expectations

 Thanks to Debbie for the following quotes:

 Carter: I didn't go through every med student, Dave!
Dave: Oh yeah, why not.... Just kidding my friend, if you want me to back off, say no more.
Carter: No, go for it. You two are perfect for each other.
Dave: Consider it done.

(Carter and Dave discuss Deb)

  Mark: You should really use a U-Lock....anyone
with a pair of bolt-cutters could take that right out of there
Dave: Thanks, Mom.

Dave: Hey why didn't I get to go?
Carter: Because they don't get sick in the chopper.
Dave: I already told you, I had the flu.

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